Evelyn Shepherd

Planes, Trains, and Taxis.

Planes:

On a sixteen hour flight from Australia I got stuck sitting next to an English lady who was all elbows.  I mean, those suckers should have been registered as lethal weapons. Jab! Jab! Jab!  Joe Frazier had nothing on her. Trying to keep out of range, I ended up sharing half of my sister’s seat. Needless to say, she wasn’t very happy either.

About thirty minutes into the flight from hell, the English lady pulled a handkerchief out of her pocket and rubbed briskly at her really hairy underarms. Ewww!   Where the heck was the flight attendant when you needed her? I pushed my call button frantically. C’mon, c’mon I can’t take another 15 hours of this crap.  After what seemed like an eternity, okay it was more like five minutes, the flight attendant walked up. Before I can say a word, the English lady…

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